On the Beautiful Blue Danube

Not feeling it today, the world can go away

Not feeling it today, with the world in dismay 

chaos reigns supreme, the devil in his scheme

There is no escape from the Bay of Biscay to the cape

Israel in the east and Gaza in the west

when peace will come along, no one can guess

at rest in my bed sleeping soundly from the news

regretfully shaken with the blues

a single escape sets my soul at ease

travelling through space gathering my needs

at last arriving by shinrarta dezhra 

shivering a cold so deep from the never

Jameson’s Memorial a wonderful sight to see

beauty of the Blue Danube as in a memory

an elegant waltz to welcome us all home

onto Sol, the Earth and Rome.

in a land of freedom with love and no war

then back to space, well that’s what dreams are for. 

Painfully Sane

Through the struggle of caring bleed

cooperation is conceived 

take a moment to breath

from the pressurisation of greed

am I about to implode, from this world I concede

emotionally struck deeply incensed within! 

I cannot consume this torture o’more

still I say good morning with a with a smile or grin

I want it to end, the strife that I am in

In pain each day, am miserable, not desired

tears held back, torturous brain, ecliptically sane

if I am free from these chains would I come here again?

I scream and cry, yet I try to hide

the hurt is too deep to pretend; I am so tired

it’s a dead give away, people not sure what to say

they go quiet and idle away, just another day

Irrelevant consummation as ‘king James’ once said

alone in this torture with nowhere to go

No one to talk with just a black hole

The fog

Words are spoken. Not necessarily true

stories are foretold about me and you

“He’s always late”, she doesn’t eat

Unless it’s some cheese and a plate full of meat

irrelevant rubbish, neither truth nor very sweet 

Work hard for years, not a thank you in sight

give all your time, strength and your might 

wonder if one day be recognised for your worth

instead of your belly of carbs 

and your exaggerated girth

Is it really worth it? never been til your gone

bullied through school and 60 years on 

lies are more telling than years of hard slog

beaten to the ground like an uncared for dog

never will see the trees through all of the fog

Gregariousness is a fake kind of me

hidden from view is where I’m comfortably 

alone in the world created from fear

never let it be shown this emotional tear

you’ll always see me happy without any care. 

no one person can help the struggle you feel

a climb can be lonely and always up hill

just keep on going to reach your goals end

through life or through death 

One day, your struggle will end

Which is odd

Should you be outside the world looking in?

OR

Inside the world looking out?

try being both to se exactly what it is about

2023

Once apon a time in England - garden of the world,

People were happy and kind except in the winter chill

a lady came along, she taught everyone a lesson,

the need for greed, street doors closed, 

neighbours were unkind, people became bankers

frequent lesson learnt is how to be wankers

Now we live in another time, could say a tainted line

the sun beautifully shines but not in summertime

winters are darker due to how we feel

consecutive governments are wreaking overkill

the health service is dead, rich people are well fed

millions will suffer for a want of meagre cash

percentages of wealthy give the poor a bash

We should be prepared to wipe the slate clean

invest in people then not be so mean

unemployed are in a state of ignored

nationalise everything to kill profiteering 

invest in humans and bring Christmas cheering

vote out the rich, let working people in. 

let truth be true refuse to accept lying! 

The earth

Scores of souls crawling tormented begging for a righteous end with a fortuitous future. 

The only hope of freedom drawn out of the dream from a bloody leaking suture.

Corruption in the air, everywhere around 

ghouls of evil leeches dwelling in the ground

a small group born to travel disregarding law

follow the messy trails of shit, ever forging war 

tiny cracks of road ahead beg what is it for?

Masters of deception in thousands pound suits 

over zealous greed deception of the poor

thousands of the elderly, murdered by the score

move them to the danger zone

show them what it’s for

balance the books, money under the mattress 

society destructively broken, confusion in its wake

hear the thunder roar, feel the ground shake

hurt yourself again to feel if your awake

EPILOGUE 

Just an idea to give the few people who read my eye burning poetry, I wake each morning to face another day, hard to do but everyone has to do it. 

I am living in what I feel is a wonderful world with the nature of gods earth.

 although I am too sensitive for this living,  I have unfortunately experienced the worst of people and seen the best but very few times. I am disturbed by war and greed, I am hurt by what I read in the newspaper of children being hurt and elderly mistreated, I am angry by the corruption of politicians, just one decision can alter or destroy so many lives, also the treatment of people less well off or unemployed how can society care so little?.

I cannot change what has become and it doesn’t get any better, perhaps why I live my life with depression, I love it when the sun shines but I cannot feel the happiness it brings, I don’t want to live but I don’t want to die. I write to deal with this disturbance.

I live in hope this will change and pray suffering is less for all. I am a working man and always have been, I show no contempt for those that have done well or those that have tried but no one has helped them be the person they would like to be, in my experience one cannot always achieve alone! 

Be good to each other and remember everyone needs love, if it means hurting someone to forge ahead then don’t do it. ‘Be kind while you climb’

Take care

Regards

Pat 

Notting Hill Carnival

A wonderful spectacle for all to see

joyful occasion without the need for weed

enjoy goat curry with fragrant rice

baked up dumplings that taste very nice

Jamaican patties deliciously yum

Hear the music, melodious steel drum

beautiful colours so wonderfully done,

Make your luck to see your chosen truck

it’s a get together for love and joy

throw the knives in the bin

save the life of a mothers boy

make what you see, be mellow and free

grow tall and as strong as a grand oak tree. 

be better than them with illness of will

Notting Hill is a carnival of happiness to fill

Unanswered Questions

I wonder will this sickness ever stop, will I ever have enough money to shop?, will my heart hurt forever?

will It destroy the good there is around or n…..

I, hoping we could cure this together

a mystery berates a person with lowered esteem

a confounding act of poor management it seems,

Why a destructive force within exists 

I have found very little joy that lasts or gives

I pray there is something warm to inspire better 

love forever in you, not weakening or shattered 

yet I am asking far too much to hold you again

for like a delicate flower, petals would fall

as rain, followed by my tears 

strength is a thing that I once knew well enough

now I am clothed in weakness and destitution 

I fear my heart and soul, will never know a resolution 

I could end it now without shame, stop confusion

my god why not allow such a hurtful act of self?

I ask without any meritorious objection 

then again I wait and on reflection……. 

hope to see the clouds dissipate for sun. 

Teddy bear

 A window of light in a long dark tunnel  You were born a miracle boy, a spectacular joy

 a child is always a beautiful thing 

You were no exception, my heart in song did sing

proudness overspilled, but I miss you too much

now I have slipped, and once again am falling down 

The slippery slope with a cloud and a frown

I outwardly show that everything is alright

yet I’m dead inside and have no more fight

I ask ‘will this be my final intervention?’

to disappear without a mention

It’s wrong to be self absorbed 

I wish I could stop it yet I cannot of course.

Just Forget

Forget the pictures, the times in life

forget the moments, forget your wife 

forget the turmoil , disasters hand

forget your childhood in another land

forget your talent that made you great

forget your children, forget your mates

a tortured future is what you will find

The joy has gone, love is unkind

Forget the photographs, forget those times

there is no future for a damaged mind.

Choices to make

In a postcode war, integration of vile 

if only the choice would be, to wait a while

imagine a moment to stop and think

drop the knife, drugs and drink

save the future lives of at least two young men

drug fiends going nowhere, then again! 

Symphony

I feel the music, it’s in my soul 

filling a gaping hole

prancing and dancing as if by magic

the story is a sound that moves me far away

then melancholy it stirs my emotions to sway

I weep as it captures my all, in tender heart

joy is at an end before again it starts

The sky fell

Temperate disease, iradical power

Alters delightfull to bitter and sour

the question on humanity’s lips

‘where were you, when it fell’ 

A moment of peace or peaceful desire

Left in a quandary, impeccable choir

The sky so vivid with burning colour

momentarily blind, an explosion of fire

Crows lay around with a deathly hope

remaining carcass, immovable scrub soap

all is well, yet there’s darkness inside

contradicting action, posthumously hide

The largest flower most beautiful bloom

brings the finality far too soon

crest of dust, mighty throne

peaceful surge, though not for long

Ineluctable darkness in the glorious sun

shrouded in a cloak of what’s to come

some will simply wonder why

was it a message from heaven or hell? 

others will never forget when the sky fell.

If I were King

Talk the talk 

Fight the fight

If I were king

I bloody well might

Silent reminder

a long queue of traffic at temporary lights 

rain briskly falling on the windscreen 

swish a swish the wipers sweep

drowning out the buzz I keep

clattering a pitter patter

screeching rubber thudding stop

hoot from the car behind 

waking from the trance, I hop

noise returning, no escape

the sound at night, a wee awake

deep loss of joy is my pay and stake

Spring awake

Enlightenment of spring, 

burst into early existence reaching for a peek at the sky 

fragility of a slim stalk begging why?

a beautiful hue of yellow trumpeted fragility 

singularly is sparsely weak

in mass a chorus doth speak

Fitting in

If I have to be a conformist it’s with a rebellious ache

fitting in, within the line, 

I feel an eruption and a quake

denying freedom beguiles in me, 

a catastrophic shake

nightmares are so frightening 

yet even worse, while I am awake

Red Rose

I begged for a rose with scent so sweet

Planting it young beneath my feet

then watched it grow the flower red

It was joined by its sister in the small rose bed

on and on the bed grew fast 

with many colours that were set to last

but you see the crash then petrol burn

upon my field of roses grown

I pulled you from the burning wreck 

then cursed the lord 

you had broke your neck

Our true love just could not last

One red rose left, I placed in a vase

On your coffin lid made from glass.

Starry night

A starry night, a wonder in sight

not to be seen clearly in the city 

it bleaches out the wonder that is space 

Without a thought we leave our trace

It is such a damn pity, selfish and gritty 

Walking the streets within my town

I look around mainly looking down

whitish spots across the pavements 

Mr Blobby’s raining gravements 

hard stick gum, lazy ravers

When we’re visited by an alien race 

will we see the laughs upon their face

then leave earth quickly, as fast as they came

go back home to never return again

disgusted sick,  for what they see

Leaving a review of a backward creed

Burying litter for the future

poisonous mass from an open suture

toxic fumes, a disgraceful mess

In a thousand years, we will be gone

leave them a present, help them digress

A starry eve what a place to be

on a clear night, look up and see

A twinkle of diamonds feeling free,

where would you go hypothetically ? 

Depression

It becomes dark once more

closing in; to a place I’ve known before

where I build is torn down; elusive

I cannot get close to them anymore

legacy is a state of mind, untrue and unkind

stepping deeper into despair, I am blind

disliked for my phoney, the truth to bare;

Is a place that I am; yet do not dare

perpendicular through a looking glass

In this world I know, there is no care

I trust no one; then no one dare

taunted by loneliness, in this place of here and now

nothing but the fear; running off my brow

Tough it

Accept no more the dourness of a hard stance

a prance, choosing in thy stead to dance

will thy hand wither to grasp a soft touch

some love unreserved at a gentle glance

Pretentiousness storytelling a sly foe

be in doubt of her ways and where she goes

relent; she will not, smiling with her final kill

blood smeared talons rip out  your heart with ill 

forcibly driven inside by hurt, the dirt 

unable to cleanse away thy pain

beneath a shower without gain

a place to return to again and again

Thus to end it now; a subtle memory of shame.

Genealogical Emptiness

I tasted your bone devouring loss once more

 holding you close within my heart

the gravelly taste of dust and stone 

has proven you are gone 

 slamming shut life, the last door 

A  heart thumping realisation, 

I am more alone now; than I will ever be

torture of a heartbreak that can never be free

hope to close my eyes then never again to see

desire as belonging, born before time,

understanding little, infusing rhyme, 

gentle, kindly, loving soul; somehow a crime

to be alternatively meek, others see weak

 rivers are from mountains, paradise we seek

Forests of Doom

A muster of trees,  strong in their talk

they hug one another closely 

Holding fast at the stalk

growing tall,  leaning back, outward and keen

an argument, they have thwart, or so it would seem

Clearing leaves in the winter 

the wind it doth’ blow 

a little woodpecker is making her hole 

a large Douglas fir, keeping distantly lone

he steadies his feet with nuts on a cone

Wild winter passes, the kings bows are strong

everything is fine until them people come along

Hacking down forests, killing the young

making a clearing the grumble has gone

trees stop talking, sadness has come

For everyone knows, there’s no strength; in one

the future looks bleak, man does not learn

kill all the forests with peril they’ll learn

a breath of the cold in the darkness of night

the only air left, if not willing to fight

city’s of finance, toxicity in its girth 

no trees to fell, no life left on earth.

Under a cloud

I prayed this morning “dear lord I’ve had enough”

with all this bad weather clouds of grey cloth

I am not sure he can hear me in heaven above,

emotions so waywardly lost in dissatisfaction 

if only life could for once move in my direction

I would shout out loud in declaration 

I must be grateful really

eating sausage, eggs and bacon 

lasagna with a few Lardons 

may they be enough to beg my pardons