Almost gone forever

Golden Leaves fall in the breeze from a ruthless rupturing storm, the oldest trees are holding still with vigour, strength and brawn.

 Forests here remember an age they spoke with a thunderous call, to those now gone before mans birth at the beginning of Earths first Dawn. 

 winter approaches cruel and fast, a grand old oak stands tall, wondering when the year will end, he shakes with cold and yawns

Passed through in the night

I stroll through life without a purpose, surviving every storm, the rain falls almost everyday, it’s  to seem the norm

If the sun does not show itself soon, then.......

I’ll be gone. 

Not even knowing. 

Siblings

Brother grown down, rocked to and fro’, forever fornicating with a guitar string low, brass section of trumpeted blues, impressing the world with the musical news, should have seen him wearing wide brogue shoes.

Brother lost or never found, superiority earned at a distant sound, worry often of the impetuous fiend, some are worthy, some are deemed, ridiculous situation or so it seems, mostly swims like a trout, right direction, wrong stream.

Sister warm, the comforting kind, sometimes astute, sometimes blind, a caring nature will die for a cause, neglects herself as nature calls, angry in retaliation for being a fool, hurt real easy yet stronger than all, loving sister to everyone and all.

Sister burdened by feelings of grief, intelligence of a martyr, clever as a chief, artistic hand shows a beauty in the heart, quick with humour, early to start, never had time to finish what could have been, wondrous places where she should have been.

......~**

‘Tis a bitter storm that changes                    
colour to black, quick                                
ere the moment twists our fate  
Ye’, a cruel ghastly flick. 

Black Dog Watching

A black dog attacked today,
no reason or rhyme,
bad timing to a fragile mind,
this morning started fine,
then unexpectedly clawing a person down,
dragging away fragments of happiness,
replacing a naturally warm face with a frown
gasping for air with a tightened grip,
an eventuality of leaving a host blind.

gnarling sharp teeth,
biting as it chews,
within an analytically sensory brain,
eating it as if a delicious feed,      
sucking out the soul,
a presence of darkness,                          
with no hope left at all,
peering gradually beyond sight
one can often catch a glimpse of it behind,          
lurking on the wall.

Plastic Seas

Fragments of plastic everywhere, US of A, Europe, also here, stacks of bottles in all colours bound, take a peek,  every service station shelf and shop, look all around, you’ll be surprised how much plastic can be found.

Frustrated, in despair, I emailed a local MP, to receive some positive action only to find she gave a kind, sorry reaction, too much profit in plastic sleeves, I must admit I feel somewhat aggrieved, it is becoming hard to believe.

Can anything be done to heal the glum for every Girl, Boy, Dad or Mum?, plastic rules the waves, I hear, have no fear, my dear, there is a plastic reef deep in the sea, within it all types of Marine entity.

Waste of non-Banksy art on display, we can go to see it one day, just visit the beach anywhere in the uk, see fragments of plastic shopping bags within the waves, Clownfish breeding in a plastic anemone, Yellowfin Tuna ‘POP’ up dead, covered in oil from fin to head.

Word from Patricio :- governments and those in a position to make changes must act now!.'Everyone can do something to make a difference however, like refusing supermarket vegetables wrapped in plastic, carrying shopping in paper bags instead of plastic, cutting down on pre-packed meals.

Whoever you are, have a think today!

what difference could you make?

 

A million insignificant changes to lifestyles or changes of things one can buy, Becomes significant without a try. 

Chemical imbalance

A loathsome, inconspicuous, depersonalised fool, with what purpose does one have to live, at all?. 

Perturbed in mind, thinks so deep, simplisticly requiring a long peaceful sleep. 

Frequently concerned with troublesome news, biased self harm alas inconsistent views.

Voices heard are voices dead, clearly thinking without a clear head, arguing with self is an easy win, deny the wrong, and refuse to sin. 

Pause for a week in Nottingham

Faster world, modern Living, lots more music, much less singing, cybercrime rising, thefts decline, see that old rusty bicycle of mine.

Opium is a cure for the addiction of coke, water drinking as a vodka joke, rainbow cloud a wonderful gleam, ever so hard the workers seem.

Rivers run fast through every vein, vicar says “when will I see you again?”, has anyone here seen the gas in the main?, awkwardly having a fuck in the rain

Mortality revisits morality, a little bite to the neck will do, sister dear “wipe the slate clean”, this type of stuff is hardly here, seen. as night passes it begins to get cold, another young victim, will never grow old, how could she have been so bold, never try to ever be told.

Slice deeper  with a sharpened knife, patience for a week, see the gas rise, go ahead, have a fracking good time, for a crude dollar each, I will claim you as mine. Increase erroneous action then confess erotic mime, “not today dear, I haven’t the time.

Quarry Gate

Deep, round historical quarry, houses so low, difficult to breathe, obstreperous to know, the wind hardly blows, the sun rarely goes, it frequently floods down here below.

See the Good

When I’m asked by others ‘why am I kind to people that hurt me?’ I simply reply “I see the good in them”

’Why do you smile and say good morning to hundreds of people every day when they cannot even look at you or they kiss their lips at you in a rasping fashion? , my reply is “I see the good in them”.

Why are you keen to wave and smile at another road user who has just called you an obscene word and used their hand with a swearing sign?, “because I see the good in them”.

Why are you kind to others that do not even appreciate your existence and will not give you the time of day?, “it’s simply, I see the good in them” 

’ You say you see the good in people, yet you are easily angered by political decisions and those like David Cameron, Theresa May and Boris Johnson!, Why? “The only reply to this question is”, 

“Their actions towards the National health service, the disabled and the general population are heinous, not to mention the forcing of people into homelessness,how many people must die with illness?, hunger?, depression?, apathetic voters of this country must realise Conservatives decisions are for profit making capitalism and greed, not of a government that care about the good in people!”. 

After the so-called Brexit, wait to see Conservatives Part 2,? Irradication of workers rights with zero contracts and no protection, everyone who can afford it will be forced to take Private medical insurance to receive a third world hospital service, also the abolition of the minimum wage, following the not forgotten Tories of the late 1970’s, who did exactly this, include in this, mass unemployment to force wages down.. I cannot see the good in these people because there are no good in these people, Just hate and greed. Money is man made, it does not exist in reality, it’s just a tool to control the masses. People will continue to survive whether they have money or not. Maybe then my lifelong dream will become a reality that ‘everyone will see the good in everyone else no matter their circumstances to bring about the end for the use of money as a trade. To extinguish the world of capitalism.

The future of History

Another fish bowl angled empty, Sun is warming a purple sky, clouds dissipate acid rain, a drought is expectantly nye

Jim knows best, he’s lived through it all,  two world wars, metal plate screwed into his skull, Alas the destruction of the Berlin Wall.

Petrified by a ghost drinking tea, what a peculiar thing to see, it was a vision he saw at the end of the bed, not quite living, yet not quite dead

plastic fish, yellow snow, blackened road, batteries on the way to bring you home, squidgy squashy insects are an all time low, hear the squealing death,                                     of the great king toad.  

Shutting her eyes in a forest,                               listening to an eerie sound, wind rustling, hooting owls, rumbling in stomach, moving of bowels, no place here for shit covered snails                              

Hearing her sighs, she taps a stick, a Labrador stands close by it gives her a lick.  Having a rest in the large red chair, on her lap, a golden head peeps,                   she closes her eyes for an everlasting sleep.

Hon....oops

A bear went a wandering in the forest one day, craving some honey to eat.                  
While searching the trees for some sweet grub, a Honey Bee he did meet.                        
“Hello I’m Busy” the honey Bee did say, “hello I’m Grizzly” I have come a long way,
“what are you looking for on this sunny day” said the little busy bee in his little buzzy way,
“I’m looking for Honey, way up in a tree, I must find some now as I’m hungry you see,
my tummy is rumbling it’s been empty for weeks, there’s some delicious berries though it’s honey I seek”, the little honey bee could feel the bears need, but destruction of the hive would be sad indeed,
so he said rather meekly, “I am Just a  Buzzing bee, I am collecting pollen to make some sweet Hon....oops, I’m ever so busy”, “if you want some honey to fill your belly, it’s no good searching in trees, look for it in jars, to get the tastiest sweet flavour, thick golden honey, what a treat.
The buzzing bee said “goodbye Grizzly”, as he flew away,  “hope to see you again some day”.
The small bears face dropped, in a sad way, his eyes averted from his destiny,
“all I wanted was a little honey, Buzz off little Bumble bee” ,
 “go back to your sweet hon... oops”. The little bear said, then made his way home and went straight into bed.

The Cruise

A porthole to look out of, crest upon crest, wave to the ocean, spot the whale, it’d be a shock if he waved back now. little grey seal barking like mad, wearing his bow tie, what a cad.

Crescent of the moon will be gone too soon, replaced by the shade of a cow, riding on a spoon, the stars are dancing until dawn, He’ll be sleeping until noon. 

Punishment with self loathing, bloated torment, the Head Chef is smoking on the port, for him it is the end of the last resort, thousands overfed, fattened on roast pork, Mutton and Jam, ridiculing the savoury beef and calling it a sham. 

A view is beyond where the sky meets the sea, ignorant with wealth, sitting in the sun, drowning on whisky, he ‘bows down’, “yes sir’ says the courteous Philippino sage, pouring more scotch on a meagre wage.

Diamonds sparkle on the withered old hand, beautiful sounds of classical genre from the onboard band, away into the night her lovely gown glistens, dancing a waltz with the braided   Captain Sissons.

What a scene when the ship comes in, friends and family standing nigh, cheering and waving flags raised high, in all its splendour this marvellous boat, wearing a grand whitened coat. Passengers pleased to be ashore, not sure why, how or what they went there for.

A question of safety

One fine evening while strolling through the park, I lost track of time and it began getting dark, my thoughts went astray to another summer day, ‘ we were having a picnic under a tree’, some awesome memories came rushing back to me, while enjoying the flavour of a delicious pork pie, I looked way up into the sky, the tree began shaking vigorously, the wind blowing high, a damn conker fell from its sty and landed straight, into my left eye.

Blinded through the month of July, I felt like a one eyed spy with a monocular kind of view, like a pirate without a Parrot, a stew without a carrot, with my one good eye, I was only able to amble, while passing a bramble, I did narf cause a racket when I caught my blooming jacket, tearing from the razor sharp thorns, so not funny at all, tugging hard to get away, a thorn broke off in the knuckle of my finger and there it will linger, throbbing away but there it will stay until another day.

By order of the doctor in the inaugural part of August, the sun at its peak, a rest I would seek, feeling tired and meek, I fell asleep, I woke up at two, cream well overdue, burnt to a crisp like I’d been on a hob, my chest so sore was beginning to throb, a cold shower at night but I could not sleep with my eye, the thorn and a blister on my chest, I could not get any rest.

The next day did not come fast as I lay awake all night, I wasn’t fit to last, Getting up with careful thoughts put on my T-shirt then my shorts , I decided to have a nice gentle walk, arranging with a friend to see a show, though first I went for a pint in Bow, after one, two or three, I stood up to go, a delivery of barrels rolling down slow, I did not realise and did not know the next step I took I fell down the hole, Landing in the cellar hard, with no time for a calling card, I ripped my arm on a peg , so bloody and red, with my other cuts, burns and bruises, bump on my head, I’ve yet to mention, my broken left leg.

The moral of the story is easy when said, if you don’t want to have all these injuries, burnt, blind, with a broken leg, damaged clothes, nearly dead, the best thing that you could do is not to get up, stay asleep and stay in bed.

Wake up World

Silence the heavy birds, the rusty old rails, floating engines empty with the raising of the sails, manufactured motor cars an average of thirty grand, Carbon dioxide levels raining acid on our land.

Rain forests survival, essential for the earth, destroying every living creature in this open planned Girth, deforestation mass, a de-oxygenation catch, light another bonfire with another wooden match.

I’d like to tell you a farce of a boy that could not breathe, lived with chronic asthma, ‘til the age of twenty three, Mum was a Smoker, Dad was a drunk, Coal completely smokeless but his lungs were covered with gunk.

The government are clever, making fossil fuels Clean, Standard healthy Tax free driving for the wealthiest and mean, the poorest are to blame so make them pay more, cruelest  unnaive trick by the rotten to the core.

There’s not much fish left to buy or send, the use of plastics, coming to an end, Oceans of filth, decayed the reef foul, the death of capitalism must be now, the greed be over or the planet will die, there will be no home for the children in the future, no clouds left in the sky.

All will undo.

The world turns, it gathers moss, green as a winter, white with frost, two wars won, more have been lost, it always take war to measure the cost, social justice, a time for care, not to count  the pennies, living in fear.

Past generations, old and alone, the plenty suffer the Tories bare bone, rich do not care their greed beyond measure, unemployable and disabled are not living in pleasure, see what you have when the world reacts back, a rusty broken gate, a mark on your back. 

freedom is a feeling of penultimate joy for every Man,Woman, girl and boy, not the few that consider themselves better, not the wealthy and travelled go getter, nor the power crazed ridiculously smug, give the milk to the young carrying an empty jug. 

Race is a colour not fiend or friend, inside each person is blood that will blend, death to hypocrisy, closing of walls, open the borders, see the hatred fall, help the poorest and freely walk tall. 

patriciosviews.co.uk

Enjoy if you like, if you don’t just read, I hope you find something to gather your thoughts. 

Love is life, be happy, live it in fullness, remember to share it, for happiness is infectious, Love is forever. 

Faith for strength

There’s a black monster spinning a web, clawing at each vital part of living organism, it kills as it grows, smothering healthy organs and tissue with its putrid decay taking life from its unsuspecting host, tiny tentacles deep in flesh  leaving blackness in its place, eventually the host dies like my Mum, my Grandparents,three out of four people will also.

There is a light received as good news, sad is not all bad, miracle cures are few and far between, yet they are discovered, new combinations are found to unlock this cruel menace, survival is there, try to consider all that is great with life , love everything that is possible to love, stay positive, while fighting, new drugs are found everyday, more people are winning their personal fight,  then one day we will win over forever, for all, Cancer Will die with the same destructive force that it brought to the life that lives. No more will future generations suffer, those that have lived and those that have died will be the legacy to finally destroy it.

My prayer:

 Please God, help in finding cures for these evil diseases, destroying lives and breaking hearts everywhere. Help families to come to terms with the sadness and loss of loved ones, to know that they are with god and have the final win with eternal life. Amen.

Matthew 11:28-29

 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart,                          

and you will find rest for your souls.

Man, Woman or Man?

Man, what and who is Man?. 

Is Man a Woman or is Man a Man, striving through life to achieve what Man can.

Man is a sharing, caring species, with the ability to love for life, however sometimes chooses to be deceitful, on the edge of a knife even to the destruction of husband or wife.

Does man know him or herself, deep and affectionate, sworn devotion to the core, courageously held to defend the others  honour for forever more then turned by a fleeting glint of an eye, becoming wickedly, wild, sexy, yet gone, for sure. 

Man enters the darkness, for darkness is intriguing, interesting, an unknown to the adventurer, bewildering as space, searching for what?, who?. Go at a steady pace, for in the darkness one can become lost forever from the human race. 

Man scared to utter a word for getting it wrong so says nothing to stay silent and strong, yet alone without success, Think what man thinks or say what man says, seems to be to bold an adventure to be on, so stay silent and strong, live alone, for very long.

Shallow beats the heart of man, looking cool in a white Sudan or hard at work in his or her  white van, earning a wage to pay the mortgage, electric, water, what a hard slogger, maybe has ten pounds left for a bottle of prosseco or a cheap bottle of vodka.

So what is a man?, striving through life to achieve what man can, a slave to the rich or a traitor to the poor?, or boasting of their earthly wealth that others see as a bore. Maybe the man we speak of is not in a groove just another person on the move, not fitting in the popular scene, in the dark, never ever seen.  

What is Man without Man or Woman as Man, Man needs Man or Woman as Man for achievement as one to do what ever Man can.

Where are friends

Where are the friends which once sat at your table, eating in all their splendour that they could enable. Smiling at the jokes or the tales of fable, true friendship from the foundation up to the gable.

Where are the friends who spoke so truly, always around, worrying you so gruelly, then came the time you required their love, the guidance once offered they denied so cruelly.

Where are the friends offering advice, a mutual rescinded required device, given to them in their saddened need, once forgotten to return the good deed.

Where are the friends now you are old, always there to keep you on your toes, fighting for you against callous foes, in an imagination that never existed, duplicitous busybodies, bitterly twisted.

Where are your friends, now your alone, waiting so silently, listening for the phone, watching television the company it brings, X Factors on,  an angel on it sings.

Where are the friends caring at night, left in solitude at home, you give up the fight, lovers sadly departed a while ago, rocked your world to and thro’, then no more, all of a sudden it’s your turn to go, finish of life, all done and alone.

Clissold Park

I lay there one night, memories Came rushing back as a book of photographs, the scene laid out,Clissold Park, the day we played Tennis. Crazy Golf, the Park Keeper shouted get off the grass, we would stay all day, until it was dark.

The Fallow Deer, gracefull fawn, pretty, was a wonderful time to grow up in this city. Rabbits in the run, seemingly having fun, then peak at the birds in their cage, some boys stole my ball, I became quite enraged.

Played for the first time, Football in the scouts team, 1st Stokenewington, proudly keen, the ball came out of the sky with my head held high, completely knocked out, could have lost an eye, never played again, I resent, with a sigh.

On the hills, where once a train ran, next to the pond where there were fishermen, tried catching once or twice, clever little fish, spat out my worms and maggots, even spat out corned beef with spice.

I learned late to swing on the swings, when I did, I felt quite bold, then the caretaker lady said get off the swing, your much too old. People danced to the classical music, we began to hum, take the micky, copycat and laugh, forced to haste, then quickly run, we secretly enjoyed the music from the auditorium.

Mum would buy an ice cream from Sir Thomas Abney house, beautiful old building, I once chased a mouse. Into the paddling pool we used to splash, we had such fun, never needed cash. Ducks lined the river nesting on the side and sometimes lay in their sweet little house.

I grew up, moved away, lived everywhere in the uk, left London far behind, sensitive boy frightened from the inner city violent high, so up I got and ran away, see my sisters they’re okay, yet Clissold Park, still has a sway, perhaps I can go back there, one of these days.

Is depression dark?

Entering the tunnel of love, I ask myself ‘is depression dark?’, along with the sounds from cold, running watered glass, shattering my ears with a rush, my heart dying with a tightly wound crush!.

All at once, the winding tunnel wrenches blackness to daylight, the Kalashnikov sound of water flow, releasing into a ripple, joining what can only be described as wide mouths of screaming children on high rides, laughing, enjoyment to the full.

Birds in cages squawking revolutionarily speech to ice cream slurping brats, women crying bitter sorrow to each other, ‘men!, bastards!’, every one, big, young, old, impetuous and small, masculinity at the bar flexing muscles, standing tall, caring by not caring at all, beer swilling and a slippery fall.

Queueing traffic in the summer heat, all the time in the world to rest aching feet while looking at others in cars, also queuing to escape litter strewn streets of their holiday, puke ridden pools with sunburnt skin, white flesh displayed thin, tired from a long hard restful day.

Wonderful smiling faces surround me, “thanks for a lovely day”, they say, the very next day, ‘that’s okay’ I reply, thinking ‘I do wish I felt the same’ watching them cheerfully depart, still I feel a crushed winding of my heart, the day thunders away, I hear the sound of the river in my mind awash, lightening strikes into the night, another darkness, another fight, again I ask myself looking at the stars, is depression dark?.

Depression is a lonely journey

I awaken, its dark, I feel an ache in my heart, it’s a dread, a fear of death, a dry throat with tainted breath, blood seeps across my tongue, youth is wasted on the young, the wonder of health, a perspective view, fresh young skin with a skull tattoo.
A heart attack, a panic attack, I’m not sure which, continuing days with an unscratchable itch, life is worthless, no change made, sometimes I feel I have the mange, in a rut stuck, useless person with a pain in the butt, ridiculously ill from a fattened gut.
Once, a person full of joy, reckless, young a carefree boy, a whole being, exalted with fun, feeling the truth of what it is to be young, despair is ending, days ever ending,  O joy enter my heart, a darkened destructive way to finish a good start, what has become....
Realise after so many years, life has been hard with tears, five jobs at sixteen, fight really hard to be a somebody, to be nobody is even harder, leaving a job I loved, pleasing a cow in a china shop, it seems misery will never stop, depression is a lonely journey, now I’ve fallen off.

Baby by the river - Richard

I read a story, it caused me to weep, found in newspaper on the side of the street, a few hours old near a rat infested canal, found by a kindly soul with the miracle of how.

Mother unable to care, you were given no name then dumped you by there,  father jailed for being a member of the Krays, doing time without any praise, mother probably unable to cope left you without survival hope.

Social care with hardly any,  a child without love but love for many, your luck then changed adopted by a family with lots of love to give now at last you had a reason to live

How sad even more just to remind you of an equal score, your adopted father beat you black and blue, violent and egotistical broke your bones too, now you’ve grown, your Destiny is your own a book  of a life tainted by strife.

I thought I was unlucky, sadness from the falls your story tells me that I had hardly any at all, Richard Gallear, The forgotten child, lived to tell the tale from a miracle child to tell the tale of a man who should’ve been wild but with life brings a change to the direction of the wind, maybe change the mind of a fiend. 

May a glint of light shine through all of our darkness- God Bless.